GARDENERS have been only too aware this year that the season has been all over the place. However, judging by the front cover of the Review HOGmany and Halloween have both arrived simultaneously and early – even Uncle Fester was pictured!

As a top-tip if Mr Meredith Edwards positions the front cover of the Review at 10 yard intervals around his property, indeed they will probably turn themselves in to Ensors!

On reading the article I phoned Mr Edwards up with my diplomatic sympathies and asked him what the difference was between a boar and a hog?

"I'll let you know if I catch the porkers," came the reply. At least that's what I thought he said!

Name and address restrictively supplied with a view to saving my bacon!

– AP, ex Lydney councillor.