THE fisheries chief casts his eye over the Wye, and reports, over the last 30 years, that farmers have lost 30 per cent of their top soil to rain washing it into rivers, and silt is the major problem stopping fish from breeding.

My reply to him would be quite simple, problem solved: put all fields adjoining rivers back to pasture as they used to be.

– Name and address supplied (in case there is a fatwah on me by all farmers).