DAPHNE Pearson has, one way or another, been in the news of late.

I decided I would try and make use of the lady's perspicacity and was in the process of compiling a list of my ailments when I was given the information that she is not a medic. A doctor who is not a doctor!

This is not the first time I've come close to being misled. Consider. If you write with a complaint to a hospital and receive a reply from a doctor it is reasonable to assume that he/she is a medic and speaks from such a background.

If however, you so write to GRH the reply may well come from another doctor who is not a doctor and who does little to dispel any such impression.

There is a strong case for either straightening out or abolishing the English language.?The former course would constitute a herculean task. If the latter, where do we go? Retention of the alphabet as we know it would be an advantage. Another European language?

Simple phrases in German can sound like a string of swear words,?French grammer can be confusing,?Spanish has few irregular verbs and rolls off the tongue easily, a very large proportion of the world's commerce is conducted in Spanish.

Given a choice I would plump for Spanish. Tal vez los medicos y el vino?

– B.W.?Wheeler, High Street, Newnham.